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This week we're continuing to consider some principles that will help us to love our neighbour as ourself well. Last week we were encouraged to live with an awareness of everyone's humanity. By recognizing that each person we meet is an image bearer of God (however damaged by sin) we are invited to foster that image rather than inflicting more harm.

This week as we consider how we can love our neighbour as ourself let's add another principle to our consideration:

Principle #2:  Live with an awareness of everyone's uniqueness.

My tendancy, when I think about the idea of loving someone "as myself" is to love them in the fashion I want to feel love. If I like gifts, I presume the other person will feel love if I give gifts. If I like words of affirmation, I presume the other person will feel love if I offer words of affirmation. If I like space and quiet, I persume the other person will feel love if I give them space and quiet. The list could go on and on.

But we are all uniquely wired. If I am to truly love my neighbour as myself, I need to honour them enough to be aware of their uniqueness and learn to love them in a way that they will recognize and feel as love. Our love for people calls on us to get to know them enough to learn about them and what speaks into their uniqueness. Maybe you need to start by thinking about how you feel most loved?

One quick example of how I learned the importance of becoming more aware of other's uniqueness:

I don't like administration. I can do administration, but I don't enjoy it. Because I don't like administrative tasks, they feel like a chore to me. Because I love people and wanted to love people "like myself" I would take on administrative tasks and not pass them along to others because I didn't want them getting stuck with the "chore".

I was working with a team of youth in preparation for a VBS a few years ago. Each of the team members had unique gifts and talents. One day, while we were planning, one of the girls mustered up some courage and meekly asked, "Can I take care of registration?" I looked at her and asked, "You want to take care of registration? Why would you like to take care of that?" She looked at me and with excitement said, "I really want to make a spread sheet!" This girl loved administration. She loved to organize and keep track of things. What to me was a chore felt life giving to her.

I realized that I was holding on to things that drained me because I didn't want to subject others to them. I thought I was loving them as myself. But they didn't feel loved. They felt as though I didn't trust them because I wouldn't "let" them do things they would love to do. I failed to recognize everyone's uniqueness and so I didn't love effectively.

As you go through your day today, consciously consider the uniqueness of your parents, spouse, children, co-workers, boss, teachers, friends, and neighbours and love them as yourself . . . in a way that they will feel your love the most? It is not always easy to figure out. It can take time. But because we are people who want to show love, it is worth the effort!

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P.S. To consider the uniqueness of those within your family, you could use the free Discover your Love Languages tool at www.5lovelanguages.com. It may be a good starting poing for you and your loved ones to think about this.